Something's Tom Funk-y About This Baseball Card
Any chance Aurelio Rodriguez is behind this thing?
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1987 ProCards Tom Funk (#2134) - Card of the Day
It took Tom Funk a while to make it to the major leagues.
And if you blinked, you might have missed him as he blew through Houston.
But on the way back down, Funk left at least one lasting, confusing, and, yes, you might even say funky cardboard impression.
Take a look at Funk’s Tucson Toros card above, and your first impression might be that you’re looking at a not-so-youngish prospect enjoying the sunshine and green grass of the game.
Or maybe this is a coach card. Coaches have mustaches a lot of the time, right?
But then there’s the position designation on the card: “RHP.”
Huh. Something feels off about that, even if you don’t know anything about Funk. What could it be?
Oh, right (or not right)!
The card shows Funk batting, giving us the impression that he’s a position player, designated hitter, or other form of bat-wielder.
And he’s lined up as a left-hander.
Suddenly, that grin looks a bit mischievous.
Was Funk in on this ruse? Like Gary Pettis and his brother Lynn?
You know…grab a bat, smile for the unknowing (or knowing and complicit) photographer, figure the shot won’t make the cut or that the card won’t make the big time.
But wait! Something else about this whole setup still seems sideways. Now what could it be?
The back of the card doesn’t help much, other than sort of explaining why Funk was back in the minors:
But if you head over to Baseball Reference or Wikipedia or TomFunkipedia, the truth will probably jump out at you eventually: Funk bats and throws from the left side.
So maybe Funk was fooling around by grabbing that bat. But he didn’t switch sides to do it.
And maybe the ProCards folks were mistaken — or fooling around — with their “RHP” label. But Funk was a pitcher, so they had that part right.
However this card came to be, it’s a fun one to ponder while you try to figure out a way to step into the frame and shag a few balls in front of the billboard outfield fence lazing there behind Funk.
As for the man himself, well, Funk made it to the big leagues at a pretty heady time, debuting on July 24 of 1986. He made eight relief appearances over the next month, and gave up six runs in 8 1/3 innings.
The Astros went 2-6 in his games before he was shuttled back to Double-A Columbus. The eventual National League West champs were not accustomed to losing stretches.
And just like that, Funk was done in the majors at age 24. But, hey, considering he dropped from being a 23rd-round pick (Orioles) in 1980 to a 26th-rounder in 1983, he acquitted himself quite well.
Funk also finally made it to Triple A, in both 1987 and 1988, before hanging up his spikes for good. Not before collabing on a pretty funky baseball card, of course.
Today, Tom Funk turns 62 years old. You gotta think there will be some trick candles on his birthday cake.
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1986 Kool-Aid Houston Astros
The 1986 Astros were the subject of several regional sets, including team-issued postcards, a Mother’s Cookies run, and even a Miller Lite set.
Being a kid back then (and still mentally/emotionally today), though, I kinda like the Kool-Aid/Police set. These cards are big and bold, measuring 2 5/8" x 4 1/8" each, with plenty of Astros rainbows to light up the dark background of the Astrodome.
Place felt like an Arena Football League arena before we even knew what that was.
These cards won’t break the bank, either, with complete sets of 26 cards selling for just a few bucks each on eBay most of the time.
As far as I have been able to figure out, though, there is no left-handed pitcher batting right-handed in this issue.
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—
Enough with the Astros, already!
This is Reds country, though I admit things get a little cloudy with Cesar Cedeño. And Joe Morgan. And Bill Doran.
And, would you believe, Dan Driessen? Or Buddy Bell?
Ack. Is nothing sacred??
Oh well, at least Pete Rose never played for the Expos or anything.
Thanks for reading.
—Adam